Create Synergy by Cultivating Balance
“We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.” – Barbara de Angelis
At its core, synergy is a collection of small parts working in harmony. When everything works together, these small sources of power combine to create a much greater power equal to even more than just the sum of its parts.
Think of a bicycle. Each part, when separate, can be a wonderful sight to see. The gears, wheels, pedals, and chains have potential as individual parts. But together, they form a machine that gets people to work, allows athletes to train, and helps create memorable childhood and adult experiences. So much more is possible when the parts are working together.
But simply being together is not all it takes to build a bike. The parts must work in harmony—but one small thing being out of place can cause a problem for the entire bike.
Think of yourself as the bicycle. The things that make you, you— those are the parts. Although many people understand the need for balance, we tend to focus more on balancing external things, such as a work/life balance. Really, we should turn inwards to establish lasting internal balance.
When all the parts of your body, your mind, and your life are in balance, they work in synergy.
To consider how balanced your life is, you can ask yourself these questions:
When making choices, do I more often choose what I want or what I need?
How do the effects of my actions impact me?
What things in life do I sacrifice—and why? What would it look like if I didn't make those sacrifices?
What are my long-term life goals? Do my current actions align with those goals?
Do I carry any guilt, shame, regret, or resentment? Towards what or whom? What would releasing those negative feelings look like?
When and where do I experience pain (both physical and emotional)? What can I do to create a comfortable and nurturing space to heal?
How do you give to your communities?
It’s okay if these questions are hard to answer—they should be! Take your time and revisit these self-reflection questions when you're ready. If the answers surprise or disappoint you, don't worry.
No matter where you are in life right now, it is possible to cultivate synergy and reach your full potential.
To achieve synergy and balance:
Align your behaviors to your beliefs. When we fall into behaviors that go against our values, we disturb the balance in our lives. For example, if you value honesty, lying to a friend will negatively impact you.
To align your behaviors and beliefs, you must first discover your ideals. What do you care most about in life? The answers are different for everyone.
Then, examine if any patterns of behavior disturb these values. You may find that you value your personal relationships in life greatly but struggle to schedule time with close friends due to a busy work schedule. In this case, re-prioritizing your schedule may help you create more balance in life.
Live a life of authenticity. It is all too common for us to do things, say things, and even want things against our better judgment—simply because we want to please others. But we should instead strive to dress, act and behave in accordance with our most authentic selves.
We are often absorbed with concerns about judgment from others. But when you begin to focus on being the most genuine version of yourself, you'll realize that self-acceptance matters more than being accepted by others.
Accept yourself as you are. You can live a life of acceptance and still desire change. Nothing is permanent. Taking life at face value and saying, "It's okay that this is how things are," will help you achieve synergy.
Obsessing about specific aspects of yourself, becoming a different person, or being "more" or "less" of anything will upset the balance in your life.
Instead, value and respect your differences. Approach life with gratitude for yourself—your abilities, quirks, passions, appearance, and all.
Share yourself with the world around you.
One way to do this is to give to those around you and your community. This act of kindness has many proven benefits - not only will it make you feel good; but it is also a way for you to discover new passions and interests, and meet new people. Let the world see you as you are, living authentically and aligned to your values.
When you live a life of acceptance and authenticity, you can make mindful decisions to align your beliefs and behaviors. Don't allow anything to disturb your balance (especially yourself), and you'll realize just how powerful you can be.
